Do I need flowers today?

I am not a big fan of Women’s Day. In my eyes, it’s another celebration (similar to Valentine’s) focused on social expectations.

Can you see it?

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I love celebrating things. I do it every day. Like, seriously. I cannot remember any dinner with my boyfriend without a toast or spending at least 45 minutes talking, eating and enjoying our time. And it doesn’t matter if I sit in front of him in the sexiest lingerie or with no make-up wearing T-shirt saying ‘Save the unicorns’.

We genuinely enjoy finding non-obvious occasions to cherish .

Life is too short to wait for some extraordinary moments. In the end, our satisfaction does not come from what we have, but from what we think about what we have. And what we do about that – every single day.

I try to show my appreciation as often as possible. I love receiving gifts, but I am even happier when I am a giver. I enjoy helping others and I like to talk a lot about what I am thankful for. Even though I am not happy with many things in my life, I am still totally grateful for most of them.

When I think about my relationship, I would say that we keep it simple. And in that case, ‘simple’ stands for the most beautiful things people can give to each other.

I have in mind these little moments when we start dancing in my tiny kitchen. When we help each other with the stuff which we could not handle by ourselves. When we make stretching sessions, karaoke and give ourselves full-body massages. When we record tiktoks and go out for a walk during summer night. When we read to each other before going to sleep.

I would say that our everyday life is as good as it can be during the pandemic.

It’s safe and exciting.

As two very strong personalities, we allow ourselves to disagree, believing that saying ‘yes’ to everything would be weird. We give each other area to say what we want as well as a lot of personal space. We treat each other with respect. We’re powerful.

My expectations and I are happy.

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But I am not sure if society is.

So I, unconsciously, asked my boyfriend a few days ago what we will do on the 8th of March.

Come on. Who cares about what we’re doing and how we feel every day if HE does not bring me flowers on Monday?

Who cares that yesterday he gave me a massage, helped with the stuff I wasn’t able to do by myself and said: you should sit on the sofa, I’ll cook.

It doesn’t count.
It wasn’t the 8th of March.

I need to post something on instagram TODAY; I need to tell my friends that I have a great boyfriend (because he bought me flowers) and if my mum asks if he bought me flowers, I can answer with relief: yes, he bought me flowers.

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I am not a big fan of Women’s Day. In my eyes, it’s another celebration (similar to Valentine’s) focused on men.

Can you see it? It’s woMEN’s Day.

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I feel like it brings my value to the amount of fresh-cut flowers and wishes which I can receive from a man or plans which HE made for this one specific day of the year.

The point is that I don’t want to talk about my rights only today. I don’t want to wonder if I feel like a woman because of this date. I don’t want to be asked if HE bought me any valuable presents or ‘at least’ gave me tulips from a discount store. I don’t want to wait for what HE will say TODAY.

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I want to be treated well and equitably every single day.
And yes, I want to feel special. But not because of someone who will tell me that I am.

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So the question is: do I need the flowers today?

You know. I like plants. But I also like cheese, bananas, music and peanut butter.

But how to convince society that a bunch of bananas would make me happier than a bouquet that will die after a few days?

I can’t.

But I still can ask myself if I care.

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